The Urban Dictionary defines an elitist as “A person who believes that they are superior to others (and thus deserves favored status) because of their intellect, social status, wealth, or other factors.” Do you qualify as a member of this exclusive group of people? Take the following quiz and find out:
1. Select your pre-prandial preference from the following:
a) A glass of Chateau Le Pin Pomerol 1999
b) A bottle of Thunderbird 2016
c) A six pack of Bud
d) A glass of Manischewitz
Ten points for choosing the Chateau Le Pin Pomerol. Add three points for knowing what pre-prandial means. Add six points for having used “pre-prandial” in the past six months. (BTW, I’m a Manischewitz girl myself.)
***
Your favorite leisure time sport is …
a) Golf
b) Tennis
c) Bowling
d) Having lunch out with your girl friends and commenting on who’s wearing what at the next table.
Six points for spotting someone in a red plaid jacket and puce checked skirt. Twelve points for finding a diner with orange and purple streaks in her hair. Add four points if you know her. (Deduct 15 points if you go to the same beauty shop.)
***
3. You take pride in …
a) Reading every book on the NY Times best seller list.
b) Reading every other book on the NY Times best seller list.
c) You never look at the NY Times best seller list.
Five points if you chose a); 10 points if you picked b) and a whopping 20 points if you selected c). Add 30 points if you read your kid’s comic books when nobody’s watching.
***
4.You are regarded as the best chef in your elitist crowd because …
a) You studied with Julia Child.
b) You have two shelves of French cookbooks in your dining room.
c) You know the difference between a crepe and a croissant.
d) You specialize in potluck dinners with a French touch. It’s easy. Send out invites that read Apportez un plat, s’il vous plait. (Bring your own dish.)
No contest here. One hundred points if you opted for d). That leaves you guilt free and blame free – and makes for great chatting the day after.
Copyright 2016 Harriet Posnak Lesser
YOU MAY ALSO LIKE:
Economics Lesson by Harriet Posnak Lesser
STK’s Newest Recipe – Get it Here! Yum!
New and Noteworthy Beauty Products
Harriet Posnak Lesser is an award-winning journalist and social satirist whose articles have appeared in Long Island’s The South Shore Record and Nassau Herald, The New York Times, Cracked Magazine and others.