Thinking about your new spring wardrobe? Here are some important fashion terms you should know.
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Stella McCartney…A star like her iconic daddy.
Epaulets …Female fans of Stella’s daddy.
Cone heel … A philandering ice cream vendor.
Weft …Opposite of wight.
Herringbone … Sometimes you can carry a diet too far.
Boa… Opposite of girla.
Lettuce Hem … Slogan of striking garment workers.
Dotted Swiss … A Lucerne teenager with chicken pox.
Trompe L’oeil…French for virtue is in the eye of the beholder.
Fringe … Oooh la la! (See trompe l’oeil above).
Unitard …It goes before States of America.
Ombre … Bad guy in an old time western movie.
Vent … The answer is “thataway.” (See ombre above)
A-line … Draw one in the sand if you’re an ombre looking for trouble.
Dolman … Some guys are really boring.
Fez … A Turkish hat – or where your eyes, nose and mouth are located.
Yoke … Didja hear the one about the fashion designer who …
Applique … Steve Jobs started it.
Balaclava … A ski mask or a middle eastern dessert made from sesame seeds.
Gore … Where ya been, Al?
Hems … Chickens that lay eggs.
Seersucker… She spends too much on see through tops. (Think about it.)
Pleat … Sheep do it.
Cashmere … And I promise to kiss you back.
Yashmak … A Mideastern face covering or — name calling will get you nowhere.
Bustier … Sophia Vergara or Christina Hendricks?
Copyright 20016 Harriet Posnak Lesser
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Harriet Posnak Lesser is an award-winning journalist and social satirist whose articles have appeared in Long Island’s The South Shore Record and Nassau Herald, The New York Times, Cracked Magazine and others.